The Secret Meaning Behind Motherhood
Guilt! I must have missed this clause in the contract when I signed up for motherhood five years ago. I wholeheartedly thought motherhood would be a breeze the first time around with Kellynn. After all, I love children and have devoted my career to teaching them. Little did I know how difficult it would actually be! The sleepless nights, the constant crying with colic, the allergies and never ending ear infections. The moments when I seriously questioned my sanity! Along with these things, came the guilt. I felt guilty for wanting to sleep or for wanting some alone time. I felt guilty for wanting to put her down after holding her all day. Each year passed with a "new phase" - each with its own version of guilt.
Fast forward to present time...and still more guilt! We've since added Ella to our family and with her comes a new version of guilt. The newborn/infant phase wasn't as difficult for me, as I felt well prepared this time. In fact, it was a breeze the second time around! Instead, I now feel guilt for being a full-time, working mother. I feel like I am missing out on so much of her growing up. Because I feel I am with her so little, I wonder if she knows I am her Mommy? I feel guilty for going to work everyday. I feel guilty when I go to my Step class at the Y (the one thing I do for myself). I want my girls to know me and want to be around me. When I get home after being at work all day, I am so tired. I just want to sit down and relax (again, more guilt). But I know that time with my girls is limited in the afternoons and evenings, and there is no time for sitting around. So I leave you with these questions. Do you ever feel guilt as a mother? How do you deal with it?
Beautiful Girls - Beautiful Pictures
I mentioned a few weeks ago that I had my girls' pictures made. As my luck would have it, they were both "scraped up" and bruised for the photo shoot. Luckily, the photographers were able to edit the scratches and bruises out. I am so pleased with these photos! If you would like to see all of their pictures, send me an email and I will send the password for viewing.
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Angelle had this to say:
Guilt is something everyone feels no matter how much time you actually spend with your child. I feel guilty that I let Leah watch too much TV and don't do enough "enriching activities" with her. There are a million excuses why not, but the short version is I don't have the energy. How do I deal with it you ask? I try to ignore it. I think that is all anyone can do. I enjoy hearing about the guilt from other mommies though because it becomes easier to ignore my own. :)
- 2:15 PM
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had this to say:
Ditto on Angelle's comment. Sometimes I turn the tv on (only educational stuff, of course) to distract Jack, only so I can sneak away to catch up on paperwork or email! GUILT!!!
- 5:33 PM
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Jacqueline had this to say:
Hello! Jacqueline- Kelly's friend. It is definately hard working full-time with 2 kids. But, the fact that you feel guilty makes you a real mom. Sometimes when you have to set your child down or turn on a little TV makes you into a better mother than a stressed out one. Hang in there and don't be so hard on yourself.
-Check out my blog - I put a password on my site- long story, but would love to her from you.
http://jacquelinesboys.blogspot.com
User: mjpeebles@carolina.rr.com
Pass: starwars!- 8:12 PM
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had this to say:
I would LOVE to see the pictures! Grace and I are having more pictures taken on her 2nd birthday, May 18th... so I would love some additional ideas for pictures! :-)
About the guilt thing, it's something that is going to be there, just like our "mother's instinct"... it comes with the 'job'. I feel the same way. I go out somewhere for myself, even with my husband, and all I end up thinking about is how I should be spending time with her instead... or maybe I just miss her! ;-) It's just what we have to live with. God didn't 'wire' us to be full-time workers AND mothers, but we all have to do it and juggle!- 1:19 PM
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soapbox.SUPERSTAR had this to say:
Drinking helps with the guilt ;)
Yes please to the pictures!!! I signed on for a 365 day post challenge to force me to post, maybe you should too!!- 7:03 PM
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had this to say:
I am always feeling guilty. I feel like some days all I doo is yell at my oldest. She is going through this phase of totally ignoring everything that I say. I have been trying to spend some alone time with just her so that her jealousy of Mason is not so strong.I so wish that I could be a stay at home mommy like my mom was. I know now that I have a second child how much I have really missed.
I want to see the pictures!- 11:57 AM
